Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Actions speak louder than pants.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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