I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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