I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
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He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
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No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare