i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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