Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Randomize
