You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Panties = found
Randomize
