So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
