youre lurking in front of me
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize
