enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I party with great urgency now.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
