defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
