This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize
