Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
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Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
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