Texts From Last Night

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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.

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  (215): Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT. http://tfl.nu/2ngi
  Replies (14) Good night (2094) Bad night (693)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.

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  (814): Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn. http://tfl.nu/vfme
  Replies (18) Good night (736) Bad night (3705)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  I wish I only lived at night.

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  (734): I wish I only lived at night. http://tfl.nu/lkra
  Replies (16) Good night (4257) Bad night (751)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  oh fat girl friday strikes again...

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  (724): oh fat girl friday strikes again... http://tfl.nu/rgt0
  Replies (60) Good night (895) Bad night (4439)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.

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  (352): if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong. http://tfl.nu/rar8
  Replies (20) Good night (3940) Bad night (896)
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  (607): View more from New York

  you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY

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  (607): you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY http://tfl.nu/h6do
  Replies (47) Good night (3300) Bad night (14741)
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  (438): View more from Quebec

  that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage

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  (438): that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage http://tfl.nu/1y6d
  Replies (12) Good night (1417) Bad night (4551)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."

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  (561): And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips." http://tfl.nu/kfac
  Replies (6) Good night (2593) Bad night (1317)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.

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  (+44): It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people. http://tfl.nu/mlxk
  Replies (6) Good night (3380) Bad night (1004)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....

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  (802): think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight.... http://tfl.nu/1kod
  Replies (9) Good night (1045) Bad night (1545)
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  (530): View more from California

  the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible

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  (530): the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible http://tfl.nu/pzql
  Replies (5) Good night (652) Bad night (2157)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.

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  (512): I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW. http://tfl.nu/y0o7
  Replies (4) Good night (1441) Bad night (519)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.

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  (785): As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester. http://tfl.nu/qann
  Replies (7) Good night (784) Bad night (491)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me

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  (214): I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me http://tfl.nu/jsiz
  Replies (5) Good night (868) Bad night (445)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.

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  (484): His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina. http://tfl.nu/tfvq
  Replies (2) Good night (397) Bad night (736)

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