hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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