summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
