did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
