That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
