Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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