I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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