i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
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