Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Of course I have a pirate flag
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize