Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
