My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize