I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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