we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Randomize
