Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
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You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?