don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
