you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
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