Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize
