i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
