If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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