Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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