Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
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