your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
