Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Still dying that you shit outside
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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