This is not my ceiling
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
