In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
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I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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