paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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