he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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