I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
