genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize