Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
