My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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