carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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