I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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