She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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