No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
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