He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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