DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize