Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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