I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
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Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
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come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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